If You were a Perfect Mom, You would be a Terrible Mom.

Think about it.

If your child never saw you struggle, it would be difficult for them to learn how to persevere through the challenges they face. What example would they turn to when they felt discouraged?

If you were able to meet your child’s needs every second, how would they build any sort of resilience? How could they be prepared for a world that can be frustrating and disappointing at times?

If you were never exhausted, or in a bad mood, or feeling down, your child would grow up thinking that complete, uninterrupted happiness is normal. That would be pretty unhealthy for them.

If your child never witnessed you experiencing emotions like anger, sadness, or embarrassment, they might feel ashamed and isolated when they encountered these emotions themselves. They would have no example of how to deal with these emotions in healthy ways.

If you never made a parenting mistake, you would rob your child of the experience of their parent apologizing to them, which can be a beautiful moment and also critical in their moral development

Then there are the small, everyday things…

If your house was never messy, if you never ordered pizza for dinner, if you never let your kids have too much screen time, think about the unfair standard you would set for them as they grew into adults. Think about how much pressure they might place on themselves. Even worse, think about what type of unfair expectations your child might set for their partner.

Isn’t it good for your child to learn that sometimes we don’t have to take ourselves so seriously? Sometimes, we can cut ourselves some slack? That life is supposed to be fun? That it’s okay for things to occasionally be chaotic and messy and unplanned and disorganized?

Worst of all, you would make it very challenging for them to one day become parents themselves. If your child grew up with perfect parents, they would never know you can grow up with imperfect parents and still turn out pretty good, and even great.

I’m not sure where all of us got this idea that we should be perfect moms. Perfection is not a human quality, and we are raising children in an imperfect world.

Maybe when we were overtaken and overwhelmed by the love we felt for our children, our brains translated this into the desire to be the best mom possible and we started thinking that to be the best means to be perfect.

It’s good to want to be a great mom. Just don’t confuse being an amazing mom with being a perfect one because they are not the same at all.

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